Early in my Berlin time and perhaps later on as well, I wrote about how my Sundays had shifted in that part of my life. It was looking so very different from when I was in ministry pre my international move. Berlin was a different world as far as compared to church life. In Berlin, there are so many generations of people removed from church life. There is rarely even nostalgia associated with church. Sometimes I went to church but I also understood the need for fellowship in other ways on Sunday mornings. I didn’t really always miss the Sunday mornings that I had beforehand.

Covid of course made that even more true. Church became a place that wasn’t just a relief but could be somewhat dangerous as we gathered. It also shifted that when I did pulpit supply, I would look out to distanced, masked people who felt disconnected and it was almost as if the zoom worship allowed people to connect more.

And still my Sundays were rarely church oriented. They were days where we walked and drank coffee. Things were closed so we had to rest and have our afternoon cake down the way.

While I miss parts of that, yesterday morning I had a Sunday morning that was so lovely and so wonderful that I am excited about what Sunday mornings are shifting to.

At St. Pauls we have one service at 10:30 am. We are pretty laid back too about our worship coming together. We are organized but it feels cozy and right. Before this church I had never just had one service with such a laid back but organized vibe. With many services and many moving parts, in other appointments, I would arrive around 6:30am to prepare myself and center. I would be so nervous.

But yesterday morning I got up really early with Tadej and sipped my coffee. While he did his first playing time, I looked over and over my sermon notes, feeling it in my body. While still nervous, it feels like a different nervous. A more healthy type of nervous than before. As the sun rose I bundled the baby and put him in the stroller while the air was crisp and walked Luna around the block. I came back and switched pups and took Pushki on a longer walk with the stroller in front of me as well. Tadej fell asleep as he is prone to do in the stroller on an early morning. By the time I came back he was crashed out. So I parked him on the front porch next to the chair that is currently there. I grabbed a new hot cup of coffee and my book. Pushki sat there as well and the morning felt perfect, centering, and worshipful almost. The sun rose, we were quiet and watched.

Eventually T woke up and I delivered him to Ana to eat while I showered and got ready for church. We, as a family left the house at 8:45 to stop for a pastry on the way. Tadej fell asleep in the car since the porch nap was pretty short and he had been up since 5. We got to the church by 9:20 and Ana stayed in the car with the sleeping babe. I went in to center in a different way, pick out my stole, set up my stuff, and talk with people as they came in.

Worship ran 45 mins and felt full and like we had worship…good hymns, the word was distracted by a cute baby who came in right at 1030 refreshed from his car nap, and people were with me in worship. I could feel that connection. There were 36 in the sanctuary and 7 on zoom…all fully present for those 45 mins as far as it felt from my place.

We coffeeed and snacked and my little family left around 12:15.

Sunday mornings I think will look more or less like this now and it is so sweet. I am grateful.