To the man who paid for our meal on Tuesday at lunch:

You did not know all of what was happening on Tuesday when you secretly paid for our meal at the mexican restaurant. All you told the waitress was that you were paying it forward. You silently paid and we didn’t even know it until you were well gone from the restaurant and we had pulled out our credit card.

You didn’t know that I had just driven one of my dear friends to Eugene from Portland that morning so that she could grieve her uncle. She lives in Berlin, it is where I met her while living there for five years. She became like family and I had picked her up at the airport Monday evening, we fed her tacos and then early Tuesday morning I drove her just to get a few more hours in the car with someone who knows me well and I her.

You didn’t know that I took my 8 month old son so he could get that time too with “Aunt” Paige and so that it could give my wife time to work and just be.

Because you didn’t know that my son is going through a phase that includes little to no sleep, lots of grumpiness because he is more aware of the world around him. So he complains more, gets a bit more anxious when we are not in the same room and is grumpy because his little body is growing faster than he knows what to do with it. So I brought him along because we are two incredibly tired mamas who love him so much we burst but are also wondering what is going on here.

And you didn’t know that I had stopped in Lebanon on the way back to Portland to see my mom. She watched my son while I hopped on a zoom call to plan worship for the church that I work at…a new job with lots of transition and I am having a great time but I am also sometimes slightly overwhelmed with all of these new roles. New mother, back to pastoring in a new place, new home, etc. So I stopped to hang with my mom for some more support and she is a big reason we have moved back to Oregon. To be near family and even more so, my mom.

So after all of that we wanted to spend more time together and went to lunch. We chose mexican food because we could both eat it every day of our lives if we had the choice, we have that in common. And you didn’t know that we talked the entire time because we are closer than ever and in between stories we picked up the toys that my son, her grandson kept throwing on the floor in his fun new game about gravity.

You didn’t know that when we would find that you paid, we felt like the whole world looked a little brighter and we were moved by your gesture. We wished we could thank you profusely and tell you you made our days better in the midst of a lot going on.

You didn’t know but you just did it and it was truly appreciated.

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To the waitress last night who held Tadej and walked him around the restaurant as we ate:

You showed up at our table with glitter all over yourself and flowers that were bright yellow and Tadej was taken with you right away. You called me “sis” and “girlfriend” as I ordered and made us smile.

You didn’t know as we ordered that we are both bone tired because we are at the beach house that my parents own and our son has decided he doesn’t want to sleep here. You didn’t know that this is our most favorite place on the planet and we just needed a dinner to take a breath in the midst of a huge transition to Oregon on my Sunday away from the church each month. You didn’t know that I pastor a congregation that went on this morning without me and that was ok.

You didn’t know that as you picked up Tadej after asking so nicely that he would take to you like that and cry when you put him back down. You didn’t know how lovely it was to watch my son find someone so fascinating and accept them fully as they are. But you took to him too and somehow you both just knew to be friends.

You didn’t know that he still has some glitter on him the next day and that I will remember that you let us eat for just a minute without having to keep the baby entertained because he is a bit crabby these days and grabby too. We are on our toes and yes we know that it changes and we will be on our toes even more the more mobile he gets. But you didn’t say that…you were moved that we trusted you and chatted with you and you didn’t say…just you wait or get ready or any of those things. You just affirmed us at the table.

And what a gift that was!

Thank you to people who do things just because it is good to do and makes a world of difference!