On Tuesday, Ana and I found ourselves in the area of Berlin that is called Mitte as we wandered along the river. The day hadn’t turned out any which way that we had planned. We were both feeling robbed of our trip to Belgrade, robbed of a few more days of vacation and time away and both pretty homesick about it. I was homesick all weekend due to many reasons and Ana was homesick because we were supposed to be at her home with her family until Wednesday. I was hoping to glean some of those home feelings from her family as well. Each time I hang out with Ana’s family I feel more and more at home with them so I was looking forward to that space if I can’t be with my family.

That morning we had been cranky with each other but in walking the dogs we quickly discovered that we weren’t really cranky at one another, we were more sad and cranky to the world. We just didn’t really know where to put it correctly. So we revamped and talked and took a different route. We decided to go to the biggest bookstore with an English selection possible which took us to the most touristy part of town, even when there aren’t that many tourists around. This is how we ended up walking along the river and taking in the sights we don’t normally. This lead us to both realizing we were pretty hungry and landing in a burger spot that was one of the most touristy places we have eaten in Berlin. We giggled all the way through….looking at the menus, ordering our food, eating our food and finally hearing the server say, “Enjoy the rest of your vacation!” We laughed heartily out the door and finally back to the bookstore that was the original place we wanted to go as plan….W? At this point?

While we giggled at the comment about our vacation in our own town, it was the rest of our vacation for now and it just seemed to fit.

It is now Oct. 3 and our official vacation ended when Ana started her new job just a few days ago on Oct. 1. Our month “off” has passed and it was full of twists and turns and also moments of relaxation and tons of fun as well…even with the dog trauma.

We are back in it, our lives here in Berlin. While Ana returned to her computer and launched into getting to know a new space, a new company and new role, I filled my last two days with meeting with people. I return to school in one month but in the meantime I find myself working on sermons, offering pastoral care and space to be, and I plan on writing and writing if I can muster it from the muse. I will return to nannying some although I am discerning just how much that will be and I continue the work of finding my way here in this space. What do I want it to look like? feel like? be like? What can I offer in this COVID world in the form of ministry and care? The autumn tends to spark all sorts of new ideas within me…what is feasible? What could happen? What should happen? What is responsible to try and what should wait?

What is the autumn sparking in you?